Changes

Day 7. I woke up this morning to gray skies and a light rain. Spring seems to be knocking at the door. I had my morning cup of java, Starbucks Natural fusions Cinnamon, it was so refreshing as I looked out the window meditating on today’s post. I survived a week of writing my blog. I am putting the finishing touches on my grant that’s due on Tuesday. I feel so alive and energized. But I kept hearing my dad’s voice about my change in attitude. So I stopped and allowed the fear to run its course, you’re not good enough, you’ll never get it, it said. Change is life’s mainstay. Perfection, fear and change cannot take center stage at the same time. So, this past week I opted for change. Life has become way more fun, open and I accept the imperfections because they are part of the process. The discomfort that creeps into the space of doubt about sailing into uncharted waters, serves as a gentle reminder and allows me to be more creative. Letting go of how things were, no matter how fractured things may seem, is not an easy task. It takes a ginormous amount of energy and courage to let go because it is an inside job. It instills grace. Grace to forgive myself and others, to let go of ideas of who I think I am or should be and how I think things and others should be. This allows me to surrender, replacing my old negative thoughts with hope. Change happens whether I choose to be a part or not. It’s only been seven days, however, I believe it has been the most exhilarating seven days that I have felt in a long time. My new mantra has become, “Let go and Let God!” Peace out!